Bart's chalkboard writings
I WILL NOT INSTIGATE
REVOLUTION
I WILL NOT ENCOURAGE OTHERS TO FLY
I WILL NOT FAKE MY WAY TRHOUGH LIFE
I WILL NOT TRADE PANTS WITH OTHERS
I WILL NOT SELL SCHOOL PROPERTY
I AM NOT AUTHORIZED TO FIRE SUBSTITUTE TEACHERS
ORGAN TRANSPLANTS ARE BEST LEFT TO THE PROFESSIONALS
BEANS ARE NEITHER FRUIT, NOR MUSICAL
I WILL NOT SEND LARD THROUGH THE MAIL
I WILL NOT HANGE DONUTS ON MY PERSON
I DO NOT HAVE POWER OF ATTOURNEY OVER FIRST GRADERS
NERVE GAS IS NOT A TOY
I WILL NOT MOCK MRS. DUMBFACE
NO ONE WANTS TO HEAR MY ARMPITS
THE BOY'S ROOM IS NOT A WATER PARK
WEDGIES ARE UNHEALTHY FOR CHILDREN AND OTHER LIVING THINGS
I WILL STOP TALKING ABOUT THE TWELVE INCH PIANIST
I WILL NOT BELCH OUT THE NATIONAL ANTHEM
I WILL NOT GREASE THE MONKEY BARS
I WILL NOT BARF UNLESS I'M SICK
I WILL NOT EXPOSE THE IGNORANCE OF THE FACULTY
I WILL NOT CONDUCT MY OWN FIRE DRILLS
I WILL NOT PRESCRIBE MEDICATION
A BURP IS NOT AN ANSWER
I WILL NOT EAT THINGS FOR MONEY
GOLDFISH DON'T BOUNCE
NO ONE IS INTERESTED IN MY UNDERPANTS
I WILL RETURN THE SEEING-EYE DOG
THE CAFETERIA DEEP-FRYER IS NOT A TOY
I WILL FINISH WHAT I STA
BART BUCKS ARE NOT LEGAL TENDER
I WILL NOT SCARE THE VICE PRESIDENT